The Love We Deserve

deserve

In the last three years, I have struggled with my supervisor, who represents my mother.  She puts fear in everyone who works for her with threats of termination nearly in every encounter.  This last few months have been a period of reflection on my situation.

Recently, I hired a new staff member who represents my brother as he is very smart, but substantially more timid than me.  I feel very protective of him as I fear he may be injured by her.  These dynamics have repeated many times in my life.

This week, I am spending a week in Florida alone reflecting on what I must do for my emotional recovery.   What I have come to realize is that it is time for me to let my mother go, and allow my brother to learn self reliance.

It is a sad realization that I have been hanging onto my past where my mother terrorized my brother and me.  I have not been able to forgive her for her behaviors against us and injury to us.  However, it is time for me to let go.

I need to let them both go, to forgive her, and to let my brother become the man he is intended to be.  In truth, I love them both very much, as I also love my father deeply.  It is letting go of my past, in order to move onto my future.

In my future, I am free of the emotional wounds and burdens of my past.  There will be others who can love me the way I deserve with kindness and compassion.  As I learn to love myself everyday, I move onto a future when I will be able love others the way I would like to be loved.   May you learn to love unconditionally and find the love you deserve.  (Copyright 2015 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)

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