How human I am as I meet others in my world and see myself within them. Last night, I met some people for happy hour. As I talked to each person and interacted with them, I can see myself clearly of my fears, self loathing, and judgmental ego.
In others, I can see myself and how I reacted to them. When I returned home, I realized what these individuals showed me something about myself. In one particular situation, I was talking with a hair dresser, and another women came up to our conversation and commented on how she would never allow her hair to go grey because her boyfriend would not like it. My response was, “it’s your hair and you can do whatever you want with it!”
I felt extremely judgmental about her, and felt she had no self esteem. Upon reflecting upon this judgment I had about her, I realized that this is a part of me that I do not like. In a previous relationship, I was told how to wear my hair and how I should or should not make up my face. I recalled that these comments really upset me, but felt the need to please this man in order to receive and deserve love. These incidents really left a deep impacts upon me about his conditional love of me, and about my lack of self esteem within myself.
These revelations about myself are showing me how to grow beyond my smaller self motivated by my ego to become and embrace the spirit that I am within. This small step in self awareness is a big step on my spiritual journey forward. (Copyright 2015 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)