This weekend, I spent a lovely Sunday having brunch and spending the day with my two close girlfriends. We shared about our struggles and difficulties with our respective lives. We talked about how others in our lives directly effect our moods and emotions. In turn, affecting our happiness. This was a great opportunity to understand why we allow others to affect our happiness.
Both friends had difficulties with their families. One friend’s sister was diagnosed with cancer, and the other friend worried about her father dying who had been sick earlier. I am not saying we should not care about our family members, but why would we allow other’s illnesses directly effect our own happiness. What we concluded is that we are really worried about ourselves.
One friend admitted that if her father died than she would be responsible for caring for her mother. The other friend admitted that her sister’s death made her fear her own mortality. In each of these situations, my friends are worried about something that have not yet come to pass. Regrettably, their worries do not impact whether the event would happen or not. In fact, all their energies are focused on worry and truly does not help them live happily. Each of them admitted to me that they currently are not very happy.
I believe that they worry also because they fear losing their loved ones. These fears occur within our own minds as these events have not yet come to pass, and the energy spent fearing and worrying is truly wasted. In my own life, I have attempted to live in the present moment, and address what is happening immediately before me. What has not occurred, I cannot predict and may not be able to control.
The worst thing to do for our happiness is to worry from fear, as it simply does nothing to improve our lives, but creates stress, anxiety, and depression. Recently, I have come to realize that my happiness is not derived from others. If people leave me, or I lose my job, I still will be happy as I know there is something or someone better waiting for me. I truly believe that once I do my very best and try my hardest, everything I need will come to me at the perfect time.
This belief frees me from stress, anxiety, and depression. I can honestly say that I am happy about 90% of the time now, even if I don’t get exactly what I want in life. I believe now that what is meant for me will never miss me, and what misses me was never meant for me. This is the art of letting go. This belief gives me the peace to live in the present movement without fear and anxiety. (Copyright 2016 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)