I was one of those people that others talk about at Christmas and Thanksgiving with depression, sadness, and loneliness. After years of therapy, I came to realize that I was abused by my parents which caused severe depression and suicidal thoughts.
My therapist helped me separate from my family as continuing contacts with them caused great emotional and physical harm to me. After that, I had many years of depression, sadness, and loneliness during the holidays.
Not surprisingly, I was divorced due to dysfunctional and negative behaviors I practiced with my family. It has been many years that I have tried to change my life and these negative behaviors.
This aloneness has taught me to become independent, self-sufficient, and nurturing to myself. This year my partner had to travel to see his mom in the nursing home. Therefore, I spent Christmas alone.
During this alone time, I took myself to the beach, shopped for myself, hiked and painted which is a form of healing therapy for me, and had a wonderful massage. Slowly I am learning that taking care of myself is just as important as taking care of my loved ones. We must love ourselves first before we are able to love others. (Copyright 2018 awakening journey with all rights reserved)